PARENTS AND EMOTIONS
For children, developing self-awareness, and self-control are not something innate and natural. Children are not born with the ability to do that and they need someone they can trust to teach and guide them through those emotional journeys. And parents, you are the perfect guide and teacher to educate children about their emotions and feelings.
The first step in educating emotions is for parents to understand their own emotions, their self-awareness and self-control. How parents handle and react to emotions served as a model for children. If parents react to anger and sadness using violence, children will most probably react the same way too. But if parents react to negative emotions with calm coping strategies, children will then learn how to cope with their feelings better. Therefore, parents, it is important for you to first understand your emotions and feelings, before understanding your child's. Because how your child reacts to his emotions reflects on how you deal with it yourself.
If you constantly find yourself getting angry and frustrated at every small little thing your children did, it is time for you to take a step back and keep your emotions in check. Find out what is really triggering you and how you can manage those emotions more effectively. Once parents can manage emotions appropriately, only then parents can go on guiding children to manage their feelings.
Below are some strategies that can help:
1. Be mindful of your emotions. Take note of how you are feeling and find out what is triggering those negative emotions.
2. When you feel like you are about to explode or yell, take a deep breath. Step back and calm yourself down.
3. Remember, self-control is important. You want to model to children that you are capable of managing your own emotions without reacting to them.
4. Once you're calm, you will be able to reason better with your child.
Children watch and learn from their parents or guardian. When you model the above strategies to your children whenever you get angry, they will eventually pick those coping skills up and apply it to themselves. Parents, let's not be reactive to children's emotions, instead be proactive by guiding them to manage emotions effectively.