There's a fine line between caring and pampering. Here are 5 signs you are over-pampering your child and hindering their path to independence.
Your child always says "no" or "I don't know."
Does your child refuses to feed himself, says no to cleaning his toys, and go "I don't know" to almost everything? Will you jump in immediately to do it for him? If yes, then children will not get to learn how to do it independently. Because they know there will always be someone who will do it for them, so why bother.
When children are not given the space to learn and experience real-life problems, they will lack the confidence to find solutions to future obstacles by themselves. Hence, you'll see them asking for your help for every small thing like putting on clothes, shower, eating and cleaning up toys.
Screen time or walking away while eating
Does your child insist on having screen time while they are eating? If you remove it, they will go into a whole series of meltdowns. To prevent that from happening, you succumb to their demand. Or does your child love to walk around while eating, and you have to follow them with the bowl so you can feed them? Because you're afraid, they'll get hungry.
When we allow our child to eat with screens or walk around, we rob them away from having quality meal time with the family. Children will then become less aware of their surroundings and less mindful of their eating habits.
Have frequent tantrums
Children having tantrums are a normal part of growing up. But with overpampered children, their tantrums seem to be more frequent and aggressive over time than average kids. That's because overpampered children are used to getting what they want. Hence, they find it difficult, accepting no or rejection from their parents. These children have learned that by throwing tantrums, they will easily get their demands fulfilled.
Unwilling to share and being demanding
Your child refuses to share her toys with siblings/friends. She loves to take other's toys and does not know how to play with another person. She wants others to play by her rules; if not, she will throw a fit about it. These behaviours will eventually lead to difficulties in sustaining meaningful friendships and relationships with others.
Lack of empathy
Overpampered children often show a lack of empathy at home and in school. They are unwilling to offer a helping hand or being considerate of other's feelings. They may say hurtful things or give excuses to get away from a situation. This will affect them later in school with teachers and peers, in adult relationships and the workplace.